Q: Many men, in some families, allow their wives, daughters, or sisters to appear in front of men who are nonMahrams (not a spouse or an unmarriageable relative), such as their friends and colleagues, and they sit with them and talk to them as if they were Mahrams (spouse or unmarriageable relative). When we advice them, they say that this is their custom and that of their families, and they claim that their hearts are pure. Some of them stubbornly resist, even though they know the ruling and some of them are ignorant of it. What is your advice to them?
A: It is obligatory on Muslims not to base their actions on custom; they should refer to the Shari'ah (Islamic law). Customs should be checked against the Shari'ah and if they are approved they may be followed, otherwise they may not. People being accustomed to doing something cannot be used as evidence that it is Halal (lawful), so all customs of both people and tribes must be checked against the Book of Allah and the Sunnah of His Messenger (peace be upon him). If it is permitted by Allah and His Messenger (peace be upon him), then it is permissible; and if it is forbidden, it must be abandoned, even if it is a custom that people follow. If it is a people's customs to be lax about Khulwah (being alone with a member of the opposite sex) with an Ajnabiyyah (woman lawful for a man to marry) or a woman showing her face to a nonMahram, these are invalid customs and it is obligatory for them to be abandoned, in the same way as habits of Zina (premarital sexual intercourse and/or adultery), sodomy, and dinking intoxicants should be. It is obligatory for these practices to be abandoned; their being local customs is not an acceptable excuse. The Shari'ah is above all that, so anyone whom Allah has guided to Islam must avoid all that Allah has declared to be Haram (prohibited), such as Khamr (intoxicants), Zina, theft, undutifulness to parents, severing the ties of kinship, and the other matters that Allah (Glorified and Exalted be He) prohibited, and they must abide by what Allah obligated them to do.
The same applies to families; it is obligatory on them to respect the Orders of Allah and His Messenger and to avoid what Allah and His Messenger forbade. If it is the people's custom to allow their female relatives to appear unveiled in front of nonMahrams or to be in Khulwah with them, it is obligatory for theses customs to be abandoned.
It is not permissible for a Muslim woman to uncover her face or any part of herself in front of her cousin or people such as her sister's husband or her husband's brothers or uncles. It is obligatory on her to cover her face, head, and all her body in presence of nonMahrams. As regards speaking to them, there is no harm in this, such as returning or initiating the greeting of Salam (Islamic greeting of peace) with them, as long as she is wearing her Hijab (veil) and is avoiding being with them in Khulwah, as Allah (may He be Praised) says:
And when you ask (his wives) for anything you want, ask them from behind a screen: that is purer for your hearts and for their hearts.
O wives of the Prophet! You are not like any other women. If you keep your duty (to Allâh), then be not soft in speech, lest he in whose heart is a disease (of hypocrisy, or evil desire for adultery) should be moved with desire, but speak in an honourable manner.
So Allah (may He be Glorified and Praised) forbade the wives of the Prophet (peace be upon him) from speaking softly, so those whose hearts are diseased by desire will not be tempted or think ill of them. A women's speech should be moderate, neither aggressive nor submissive. Allah (may He be Praised) tells us that the Hijab is purer for everyone's hearts.
O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks (veils) all over their bodies (i.e. screen themselves completely except the eyes or one eye to see the way). That will be better, that they should be known (as free respectable women) so as not to be annoyed. And Allâh is Ever OftForgiving, Most Merciful.
The Jilbab (a loose outer garment with no front opening) is worn by women over their heads and bodies. Women cast it over their heads to entirely cover their bodies, and it is worn over their clothes. Allah (Glorified and Exalted be He) says:
And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts) and not to show off their adornment except only that which is apparent (like both eyes for necessity to see the way, or outer palms of hands or one eye or dress like veil, gloves, headcover, apron, etc.), and to draw their veils all over Juyûbihinna (i.e. their bodies, faces, necks and bosoms) and not to reveal their adornment except to their husbands, or their fathers, or their husband's fathers, or their sons, or their husband's sons
There is nothing wrong in women showing their adornment in front of the people specified in the previous Ayah (Qur'anic verse).
It is obligatory on all Muslim women to have Taqwa (fearing Allah as He should be feared) and beware of what Allah has declared as Haram (prohibited) for them in regard to showing their adornment in front of other than those specified by Allah.