Q: To what extent one should obey his parents? Is this Wajib (obligatory) in all cases? Is it Haram (prohibited) to hire a Buddhist servant at home, particularly if this is the request of the mother? Is it permissible to disobey the mother in this case? Is it permissible for me to annoy the maidservant until she dislike staying and leaves to her country?
A: One should be dutiful and kind to his parents and obey them in matters that are good, for Allah orders us to do this in His Ever-Glorious Qur'an and so did His Messenger (peace be upon him) and considered disobeying them one of the gravest major sins.
However, it is not permissible to obey them or others in any sin. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: Obedience is only binding in what is good. The Prophet (may Allah's Peace and Blessings be upon him) also says: No obedience to anyone is binding when it leads to the disobedience of Allah.
As for hiring Kafir (disbeliever/non-Muslim) servants such as Buddhist, Christian or other disbelieving people, this is not permissible in the Arabian Peninsula, for the prophet (peace be upon him) forbade this and ordered us to drive the Kafirs out of it. It is the cradle of Islam and the place where the Message first dawned. So it is not permissible for two religions to co-exist there. It is not permissible to bring any Kafir there except in cases of necessity, as decreed by the authorities, then he (the Kafir) should return to his homeland.
What you and your mother have to do is to send her back to her country. It is not permissible for you or your mother to mistreat her, rather what you must do is to treat her in a kind manner while she is with you until she returns to her country, because Allah has forbidden wrongdoing His slaves whether Muslims or not, as the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Beware of oppression, for oppression will be darkness on the Day of Resurrection." He (peace be upon him) said that Allah (Glorified and Exalted be He) said: "O My slaves, I have forbidden oppression to Myself and I have made it Haram among you, so do not oppress one another." May Allah grant us success!